Tour of Duty... Part Three
The one where I face two of my massive fears, three if you count staying in a shit hotel!
So after 4 hours asleep on the bus, Suan’s voice buzzing through my Gorillaz playlist like an annoying mosquito, we arrived at today’s destination, sort of. We’d have to take a boat to reach the Phong Nha Cave, but before that it was time for lunch. As I was the solo foreigner now I got to eat with everybody else. One of the women spoke really good French and I understood enough of that to get by. She was really cool. Turns out they were all fascinated that I was travelling alone. My new pal said I was lucky that I was tall and strong and therefore less likely to be attacked. I didn’t tell her I’d be crap if it came to throwing punches and just agreed that my height and biceps certainly made it easier to travel unhassled. She was a tiny, fragile looking woman but I suspect if it came to it, she’d whoop my ass anyday!
After lunch we boarded a rickety old boat and headed off to the cave. Apparently during the war with the US, the locals moved in here away from the soldiers. I can see how it would’ve been a great hiding place, not to mention a good base for launching attacks on the invading forces. We sailed right inside the cave and I relaxed assuming that was it. Sadly not to be. We then got out of the boats and ventured deeper and deeper into the cave.
A couple of days before the whole thing had been flooded and as a result the footing was muddy and slippy, not to mention dark! My claustrophobia and vertigo were battling for prominence as I climbed down some slippery steps in the pitch black depths of the cave. My new French friend understood and told Tom in Vietnamese what was wrong and between them they got me through the whole adventure.
Had I known what lay ahead I might have opted out of this trip, but seeing what I saw, I’m glad I didn’t.
Amazing stalactites and stalagmites formed over millions of years, and all dramatically lit - mind blowing stuff. Must’ve been amazing on acid.
Best of all, once I’d gotten through it all, I was rewarded by a little stall selling coffee on the side of the hill!
Caffined up we were back on the boat and then back on the bus back to Hue. When I think of how fab Hoi An was and how helpful and comfy the hotel there was, it seemed sad that we were spending two nights in what was the worst hotel I’ve stayed in here in Vietnam. They actually had the audacity to pull the ‘you didn’t hand your key in, we’ll have to charge you for another’ scam when I got back that night. As you can imagine, after eight hours on a bus and the terrors of the cave, I was in no mood for bullshit. Luckily Tom was there and so I told him I wasn’t gonna fall for that, and that if they had lost my key then I wanted the police there to come and help me search my room to make sure nobody on the staff had stolen anything. Amazing how folks back down when you call their bluff!
Of course me being the drama queen I am, I got it into my head that someone might break into the room while I was asleep, so I piled up all my furniture against the door! Needless to say, nobody tried to break in.
The next morning we were off again to visit the mausoleum of Tu Duc Emperor. Bizarrely the ‘mericans turned up. Last I’d heard they got a refund and were ‘doing their own thing’ guess that didn’t work out. It was all very uncomfortable with Beavis’n’Butthead making really snide, racist comments about the two tour guides - bearing in mind his fiance is Vietnamese - I was ashamed to be in their company. Luckily Tom and I shook them off at the tomb, and for the first time he was really honest with me.
All the time I’ve been here, all I hear is how the war with the US was a long time ago, and the Vietnamese people bear no grudges, yada yada yada (the exception up to this point had been the Cu Chi Tunnels guide and her constant references to the Evil Americans). Anyway, after these assholes had tried to get Tom the sack for no reason at all, he wasn’t in the mood to make nice. He frankly admitted he disliked Americans and I totally understood why. History is one thing but apparently there’s a fair amount of Beavis’n’Buthead’s still coming today acting like they won the war and treating the Vietnamese like shit.
Of course it’s not all Americans, but obviously there’s enough of them still acting like cunts when they really should know better.
So after 4 hours asleep on the bus, Suan’s voice buzzing through my Gorillaz playlist like an annoying mosquito, we arrived at today’s destination, sort of. We’d have to take a boat to reach the Phong Nha Cave, but before that it was time for lunch. As I was the solo foreigner now I got to eat with everybody else. One of the women spoke really good French and I understood enough of that to get by. She was really cool. Turns out they were all fascinated that I was travelling alone. My new pal said I was lucky that I was tall and strong and therefore less likely to be attacked. I didn’t tell her I’d be crap if it came to throwing punches and just agreed that my height and biceps certainly made it easier to travel unhassled. She was a tiny, fragile looking woman but I suspect if it came to it, she’d whoop my ass anyday!
After lunch we boarded a rickety old boat and headed off to the cave. Apparently during the war with the US, the locals moved in here away from the soldiers. I can see how it would’ve been a great hiding place, not to mention a good base for launching attacks on the invading forces. We sailed right inside the cave and I relaxed assuming that was it. Sadly not to be. We then got out of the boats and ventured deeper and deeper into the cave.
A couple of days before the whole thing had been flooded and as a result the footing was muddy and slippy, not to mention dark! My claustrophobia and vertigo were battling for prominence as I climbed down some slippery steps in the pitch black depths of the cave. My new French friend understood and told Tom in Vietnamese what was wrong and between them they got me through the whole adventure.
Had I known what lay ahead I might have opted out of this trip, but seeing what I saw, I’m glad I didn’t.
Amazing stalactites and stalagmites formed over millions of years, and all dramatically lit - mind blowing stuff. Must’ve been amazing on acid.
Best of all, once I’d gotten through it all, I was rewarded by a little stall selling coffee on the side of the hill!
Caffined up we were back on the boat and then back on the bus back to Hue. When I think of how fab Hoi An was and how helpful and comfy the hotel there was, it seemed sad that we were spending two nights in what was the worst hotel I’ve stayed in here in Vietnam. They actually had the audacity to pull the ‘you didn’t hand your key in, we’ll have to charge you for another’ scam when I got back that night. As you can imagine, after eight hours on a bus and the terrors of the cave, I was in no mood for bullshit. Luckily Tom was there and so I told him I wasn’t gonna fall for that, and that if they had lost my key then I wanted the police there to come and help me search my room to make sure nobody on the staff had stolen anything. Amazing how folks back down when you call their bluff!
Of course me being the drama queen I am, I got it into my head that someone might break into the room while I was asleep, so I piled up all my furniture against the door! Needless to say, nobody tried to break in.
The next morning we were off again to visit the mausoleum of Tu Duc Emperor. Bizarrely the ‘mericans turned up. Last I’d heard they got a refund and were ‘doing their own thing’ guess that didn’t work out. It was all very uncomfortable with Beavis’n’Butthead making really snide, racist comments about the two tour guides - bearing in mind his fiance is Vietnamese - I was ashamed to be in their company. Luckily Tom and I shook them off at the tomb, and for the first time he was really honest with me.
All the time I’ve been here, all I hear is how the war with the US was a long time ago, and the Vietnamese people bear no grudges, yada yada yada (the exception up to this point had been the Cu Chi Tunnels guide and her constant references to the Evil Americans). Anyway, after these assholes had tried to get Tom the sack for no reason at all, he wasn’t in the mood to make nice. He frankly admitted he disliked Americans and I totally understood why. History is one thing but apparently there’s a fair amount of Beavis’n’Buthead’s still coming today acting like they won the war and treating the Vietnamese like shit.
Of course it’s not all Americans, but obviously there’s enough of them still acting like cunts when they really should know better.
Labels: Travel
posted by JoJo Smith at Wednesday, November 02, 2011
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