A Helluva Week!!!!!!!!
Sooooooo I've been strangely absent from the world for a week and this is the reason why.
On Monday 5th Feb I found myself in a cab at 6am hurtling towards Tooting. Sound glamourous doesn't it?
The reason for this dawn journey was the culmination of two years' of tenacity, apprehension and frustration. I was going to St George's Hospital to have a gastric bypass operation.
Those of you that have seen me live over the years will have noticed my weight tends to veer to extremes. Anyone out there who's known me longer will know that this has been a lifetime thing.
I have been on a diet since I was 8 years old. I'm 45 now. That's 37 years. I think I can safely say that diets don't work for me.
For me, being fat is not about being greedy or lazy, its a million and one emotional traumas and coping strategies. The same things that probably led me to becomming a stand-up comedian to be honest.
Four years ago I lost 10 stones and dropped from a size 28 to a size 12. I was in love, I felt safe and happy and the world was a brilliant place. I was exercising, eating pretty healthily, doing it all right. Then came the crash. The love affair ended and for a time I couldn't actually eat anything. Then, slowly but surely I started putting my protective cloak of fat back on. Hiding the real me away from the world.
Two years ago I was in the depths of depression, not just from the weight gain, my mother was dying with lung cancer and various other issues had all come to a head. I found Buddhism, and that started making sense of things. I began to retake control of my life, but I couldn't halt the weight gain. In desperation I went to my doctor and admitted this was the one thing I couldn't take control of myself. It wasn't the greatest moment of my life, believe me.
It took a full year for me to get the first appointment with the surgeon, and when he asked me what I expected to get from this op, my answer was simple - smaller clothes. I've been thin enough times in my life before to know that its not the answer to all life's ills. Whatever was good about my life before would still be good, and whatever was shit would still be shit. I'd just have a lower number in the back of my jeans. Not to mention a lot more money in the bank - big birds clothes are incredibly over-priced!
So last Monday was the culmination of a year of assessments and tests. The op is a very serious one, it was done via laproscopic surgery so at least I won't have a huge scar down my belly. Two-thirds of my stomach have been decomissioned via a series of staples, and my small intestine was re-attached to the new tiny 'baby stomach'.
I was in agony for the first couple of days afterwards, but was discharged by Thursday. Boy was I glad to get out! I can safely say I experienced the best and worst the NHS has to offer, the doctor's and nurses were fabulous, some of the admin staff's attitudes left a lot to be desired. The confusion within the system no doubt accounts for the massive waste of money that occurs.
I'm adjusting to my new eating plan - nothing but liquids for the next two weeks - which isn't that easy believe me. Sadly there's no real hands on information out there giving you a diet plan to follow. That's about to change tho as this has inspired me to write the ultimate survivor's guide to this type of surgery. Within a month I shall be able to introduce 'normal' foods back into my diet. Believe it or not, the hardest part is remembering to eat - you just never feel hungry! I'm using a protien suppliment cos one of the side effects is having your hair fall out! No point in being a size 10 and bald now is there. I keep thinking that I picked the wrong time to be single. If I had a man in my life I'd have a regular supply of liquid protein to feast on!
The best bit of all is i got weighed this morning and I've lost 2.5kg since Monday, added to the 7kg I lost in the month before I went in, means I am well on my way to achieving my target of shopping in Primark! Yayyyyyyyy.
On a sadder note, the death of Anna Nicole Smith, served to illustrate my point that no matter how we look, there's no guarantee of happiness in this life. I hope she's at peace now.
On Monday 5th Feb I found myself in a cab at 6am hurtling towards Tooting. Sound glamourous doesn't it?
The reason for this dawn journey was the culmination of two years' of tenacity, apprehension and frustration. I was going to St George's Hospital to have a gastric bypass operation.
Those of you that have seen me live over the years will have noticed my weight tends to veer to extremes. Anyone out there who's known me longer will know that this has been a lifetime thing.
I have been on a diet since I was 8 years old. I'm 45 now. That's 37 years. I think I can safely say that diets don't work for me.
For me, being fat is not about being greedy or lazy, its a million and one emotional traumas and coping strategies. The same things that probably led me to becomming a stand-up comedian to be honest.
Four years ago I lost 10 stones and dropped from a size 28 to a size 12. I was in love, I felt safe and happy and the world was a brilliant place. I was exercising, eating pretty healthily, doing it all right. Then came the crash. The love affair ended and for a time I couldn't actually eat anything. Then, slowly but surely I started putting my protective cloak of fat back on. Hiding the real me away from the world.
Two years ago I was in the depths of depression, not just from the weight gain, my mother was dying with lung cancer and various other issues had all come to a head. I found Buddhism, and that started making sense of things. I began to retake control of my life, but I couldn't halt the weight gain. In desperation I went to my doctor and admitted this was the one thing I couldn't take control of myself. It wasn't the greatest moment of my life, believe me.
It took a full year for me to get the first appointment with the surgeon, and when he asked me what I expected to get from this op, my answer was simple - smaller clothes. I've been thin enough times in my life before to know that its not the answer to all life's ills. Whatever was good about my life before would still be good, and whatever was shit would still be shit. I'd just have a lower number in the back of my jeans. Not to mention a lot more money in the bank - big birds clothes are incredibly over-priced!
So last Monday was the culmination of a year of assessments and tests. The op is a very serious one, it was done via laproscopic surgery so at least I won't have a huge scar down my belly. Two-thirds of my stomach have been decomissioned via a series of staples, and my small intestine was re-attached to the new tiny 'baby stomach'.
I was in agony for the first couple of days afterwards, but was discharged by Thursday. Boy was I glad to get out! I can safely say I experienced the best and worst the NHS has to offer, the doctor's and nurses were fabulous, some of the admin staff's attitudes left a lot to be desired. The confusion within the system no doubt accounts for the massive waste of money that occurs.
I'm adjusting to my new eating plan - nothing but liquids for the next two weeks - which isn't that easy believe me. Sadly there's no real hands on information out there giving you a diet plan to follow. That's about to change tho as this has inspired me to write the ultimate survivor's guide to this type of surgery. Within a month I shall be able to introduce 'normal' foods back into my diet. Believe it or not, the hardest part is remembering to eat - you just never feel hungry! I'm using a protien suppliment cos one of the side effects is having your hair fall out! No point in being a size 10 and bald now is there. I keep thinking that I picked the wrong time to be single. If I had a man in my life I'd have a regular supply of liquid protein to feast on!
The best bit of all is i got weighed this morning and I've lost 2.5kg since Monday, added to the 7kg I lost in the month before I went in, means I am well on my way to achieving my target of shopping in Primark! Yayyyyyyyy.
On a sadder note, the death of Anna Nicole Smith, served to illustrate my point that no matter how we look, there's no guarantee of happiness in this life. I hope she's at peace now.
Labels: Gigs, Misc and TV
posted by JoJo Smith at Saturday, February 10, 2007
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