Too Old To Be Funny?

After yet another week with accusations of racism, sexism, and bald-ism (is that a thing) flying around I have a new one. Well it's new to me anyway. Ageism.

Late last year I was booked to do the double of Manchester Frog& Bucket and Liverpool Comedy Central (aka Baby Blue). Then, around April/May I got an email from the person who booked me telling me the Liverpool gigs were being pulled as I 'didn't fit the club's demographic'. No further explanation was given, and it was left to me to try and work out what that meant. 

I cast my mind back to the last time I played there - when Rich Batsford used to book it - I headlined all three nights (even encored on one of them) and everyone from the bloke selling lollies in the toilet, to the punters, to the venue staff were more than happy with my performance. I asked the bearer of this bad news, what this 'demographic' was, as I thought turning up, being a decent person offstage and a funny one onstage, was the only demographic a comedian needed.

Of course, like a lot of comedians I'm sensitive and not a little insecure about everything, not just my gigs, so I began to pick myself apart, combing over every little thing in the hopes of finding out what it was that I did wrong.

Eventually I let it go and resigned myself to not playing that gig anymore for whatever reason. I hasten to add, not once did I think it was prejudice because of my gender, I've been around long enough to know that even though things aren't perfect, the circuit is a lot fairer than it was when I first started 21 years ago. Back then, women were always put on in the middle, which is considered to be the nicest spot of any night because the audience are warmed up but not legless. It became known as the "girl's spot" even when boys were placed there. Depending on the baseness/honesty of some it was also known unofficially as a 'cunt sandwich'. I have to admit, I've reclaimed that phrase as it actually makes me laugh and I chose to believe that was the spirit in which it was originally meant.

Anyway back to the main point. I sorta let go of it all, until I came to do the Manchester part of that weekend a few weeks ago. One of the guys I was working with was amazed and said he would try and find out what they meant. I never heard back.

It was only in discussion with another comedian recently that I found out I wasn't the only one who didn't fit their 'demographic'. He'd been told the same thing. Now I know this guy to be one funny fucker, and I've never know him to struggle, let alone have a bad gig. His offstage manner is incredibly genial and respectful. So while it was reassuring in a way to know that I wasn't alone in this, it was even more confusing. He then mentioned another (male) comedian this had happened to who is also a regular headliner, and the one thing all three of us have in common is that we're not 21 years old and we don't wear skinny jeans. 

Now of course there's been no official comment from the people who run Comedy Central at Baby Blue in Liverpool and this is no reflection on their booker who is from an external company and nothing to do with their policy, he books the acts they tell him to I guess. I'm pretty sure they'd never come out and say they don't want 'old' comedians to play their club, mainly because I suspect it's illegal to discriminate in this way. The huge irony is that they certainly don't tell the audience that certain sections of them don't meet the demographic. When I used to play there regularly there were more over 40's than under 40's in ten audience, and my colleague tells me there was a retirement party taking place the last time he was there.

Can you imagine the outcry if the bouncer stopped people from going in because they were too old? They can't even be honest with the comedians, instead spouting this corporate-speak ‘demographic’ bullshit.

I'm a grown up and while I may not like the truth, I can take it. It would've saved me a lot of agonising and self-doubt if I'd been told the real reason I was pull from the gig. I can do something about my act if it's not suitable, I can't stop being 53.

**DISCLAIMER

Of course I have no concrete proof that this is why the venue removed me from their show. But I do know that the three of us (and I wouldn’t be surprised if there were more than that) have nothing else in common other than our ‘advancing’ years and the fact that we are all fucking funny.